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Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 31, 2016

The Great Chase

The Great Chase

Why Friendship and Joy-Chasing are Essential for

A Life Well-Lived

 


In lieu of the increasing fans (like you),

here's a new post!

I'm not really sure what to write. It happens more often than not, actually. What really kills me, though, is how I'll get these excellent writing moods... all the stars will align and a hallelujah chorus will shimmer down from above... and then I'll get distracted.

Seriously.

And no, before you bring it up - it's not all social media distractions, either. Life gets distracting. My mind just becomes all cluttered up sometimes. Lately, I've been without a car - which has been frustrated. I don't like always being stuck at home, and it can drive me up the walls. As a writer, and really just as a regular ol' human being, the ability to get out when the fancy takes you is essential. I'm sorry Emily Dickinson... but no... I have mad respect for you and all... but still no.

I guess what I'm trying to say is how I think really good writing is something which, barring a gift from fickle muses, comes out of life well-lived. Good-bad-ugly... but still life well-lived.

What makes for a well-lived life?

I'm no Marcus Aurelius, but I think CS Lewis was on to something when he writes about Joy-Chasing in his Surprised by Joy, and also in his Pilgrim's Regress. There are things you will find, uncovered within yourself - or introduced to you by others, which stir up a Longing inside. For me, they're things having to do with mythology, theatre, traveling, Autumn, the rain... It's funny, because a tell-tale sign that you're probably on the right track to identifying exactly what your Joy is - the harder it becomes to say exactly what IT is. - Like those who have tasted of the magical food from Faerie... after you've returned from the Perilous Land, you're always left wanting in a delightful sort of agony.

Lewis humbly suggested that what we want is not, perhaps, the Thing ITSELF, but the chase. So the next time something moves you, don't try to possess it. Merely enjoy it while it is, as it is, and then carry on. Keep IT secret - keep IT safe.

Another thing I think lends to a life well-lived are good friends. A man may be the poorest in the whole world, yet if he has genuine friends he is rich. Friendship is one of those things which lend to Life's sense of meaning and purpose. When you suddenly discover that the guy or girl over there likes the same thing you do... that same secret Joy... there is often a moment, whether spoken or not, where each thinks something like, 'What? You too?'.

- This same thing is partly how I first met my to-be wife, Steph... it's how I first met my esteemed friend (and fellow author) R.E. Dean... Friendship helps make us MORE. A Joy we may have inside remains only that one Joy, but when friendship allows people to share a Joy... its like light splitting through a prism into a million new possibilities we never could have come to on our own. Shared Joy via Friendship is like staring down from a great height... we see all the twists and turnings which could have taken us higher up and deeper in - and all the other paths which could have led us on... but our Journey would have been radically different. Thus, WE would be radically different, in turn.

What does any of this have to do with writing, though?

It has exactly, precisely to do with writing because when we finally do sit down and write, we are not just putting words on a page, but little pieces of us. This is not ink, nor mere pixels which you now read - but the confluence of hundreds of thousands of interlinking friendships formed over shared Joy-chasing. Each word is not only my own - but also immaculately blended bits and pieces of people I've known and loved from all over the world - living and departed.

And it's the same when you create something, too.

Whenever someone pours their heart and soul, time and energy - blood, sweat, and tears - into something beautiful - we see Life as Art. (Tolkien would call it 'Sub-creation')

In all your Joy-chasing - happy hunting. Write on! Read on!

- Ryan
 

Monday, April 18, 2016

"We All Need A little Help From Our Friends"

My back deck last year, along with one of our cats, Baldur. -RPF


A couple of the things I've learned over the course of this whole writing endeavor is to value good friends; and the other is to do what makes you happy (and not what you think ought to make you happy).

Case-in-point, the other day I was coming home from work. My driveway is rather long-ish, so I usually come in the back of my house. It's the first thing I see (besides my bounding dogs) when I come home, and it's the last thing I see before heading out again. So yesterday when I got home, it struck me how bare my back deck was... Then later on that evening, just after sunset I stepped back outside to simply sit outside my backdoor, drink some iced-coffee I accidentally bought, and watch the stars come out. After a some time, I got this gradual image in my head about how sitting out there would be even better if I were surrounded by flowers...

The image stuck with me through till the next day, so after work, I went out to Lowes and loaded up on a smattering of my favorite flowery plants and vines, then swung back home and got to work gardening the place up.

Why do I relate a random story? Well, honestly, because it makes me happy to garden outside. I believe writing is the ultimate self-expression. If you're tired, stressed, harried, and otherwise indisposed, how... how on God's green Earth are you going to be able to create good art?

I've come to learn in order to write at your best, one of the essentials is to cultivate your own life. Look, I know life is what it is sometimes... and I know most of us can't simply generate levitating-zen-inner-peace or anything (most of the time), but we can strive to be self-aware and purposeful about how we live our lives.

Since I expanded my garden, instead of moping about the house, begrudging the inevitable siren-call of work in the morning - I was outside instead. Watering-can in hand, I dallianced amid the columbines, trumpeter vines, and pansies. Now I'm cheerfully pecking out another post, all because I did a simple little thing I like to do.

Another part of this cultivating yourself notion, is to be aware of who lifts you up? Which friends help you? Who is ready to hang out - chat - drive around town with you? Likewise- are you this sort of person for someone else?

DANGER!

As you read that last sentence, did you feel a lighting flash of guilt? STOP IT. To the best of your ability, don't live your life on 'ought to's' and 'should's'. What do you want to do? I mean, seriously. Yeah yeah, we all have responsibilities and work - but don't box yourself in. Don't laden your own creativity and don't fetter your heart. Deliberately and intentionally water your whole self. Break your own tough ground - and be aware of ruts, mental or otherwise.

Who you are, what you do, and who you spend your time with affects you. This might come off sounding like common sense, but you'd be surprised... Sometimes, we're just waiting for someone else to tell us what we've been guessing all along. This idea of balance is not new. Many people over many years have all taken cracks at it - and I'm no master at it, either. But when you write, you are expressing yourself. All of you comes tumbling through the point of your pen or through each stroke of the keys. There are no filters and there is no inner-spell check. You're writing for people who need to hear you. And you're the only one who can write you. Make good art, then. And in writing good art, be at your personal best. Know how you work. Spend time with yourself - then who you truly are can flow with sparkling clarity and power.

Or, I dunno - do what you want. These are just words on a screen, not your conscience. If you'd like to read more on some of what I've been talking about, I highly recommend just about anything by author Brennan Manning - especially his Ragamuffin Gospel.
(I also believe you can youtube him, as well.)

happy writing!

- Ryan